A story churned from the dark & evil depths of my mind.
Signed,
The Pessimist

I will keep this short and straight-forward.


It was a still night, and the smell of gunpowder hung heavy in the air. Mixed with the luring scent of 'yakhsi pala' tree (Alstonia scholaris), it was pleasantly nauseating. The blasts would have been numerous, and frequent. There was no one to be seen around, those who wanted peace had left the place long back, the rest... A child was crying somewhere, and I heard some unsuccessful words to pacify the child. The street dogs joined the cacophony. Dark stains on the sidewalk, I did not want to think about anything. I was trepid about stepping on the wrong foot or... hand. The torn pieces of colourful cloth and paper strewn on the road almost made me wonder if it were some festival.


This place and time used to be one of the best of my life. Walking under the moonlight with my two friends, this was once my rejevenation path after a hectic work day. Humming some nice melodies, laughing to the calmness of night, we used to stroll the path. There never was any traffic, and the dogs seemed benign. Dug-up roads were fun to cross. College memories brought smiles to our faces, even those which were mortifying once. Life was peaceful. Life was a festival.


I walked on, alone. Life had changed, the critical moment gone past unnoticed. Further ahead, the road curved to the left, leading to my house. The sound of my shoes crunching the gravel broke the stillness of the deadly night. The dug-up road was probably a death-trap. A shadow turned the corner, and its hooded limping owner came into view. I was, to be honest, scared. The path behind me was long, and unfortunately straight. I had to walk on. He was close now, and he was holding something. He raised his hand. I was numbed, stood staring at him.


"Happy Diwali", he said, and moved on.

Strangers

9/21/2009 | 1 Comments

A post that does justice to the title of my blog - twisted scribblings:

The world is at war, and the biggest conflicts are happening in our minds. In these dark times, viewed through my vile eyes, it is super important to know - no, to realize - a few things. The world is not in black and white, what applies to some need not apply to others. What you read in books may not suit you. I read today in two different books conflicting ideas about emotional independence. That doesn't mean the books or right or wrong - they are just "brain stimuli". One says being dependent on anyone is foolish, the other says, it is the way to go. But we are free to choose either one, or a middle ground. Ideas and principles need not be discrete all the time - at times, discreteness make things harder.

Now and then, problems don't get solved when we think about it. They mutate to assume more dimensions, and try to overwhelm us. The critical point is to realize this, and stop thinking. (Programming theme : Like a program that understands it is in an infinite loop, and comes out of it automatically.) Do we attack the root cause of problems in these cases? Maybe not, but who knows, Time may solve the problem for us eventually :)

When some things cannot be judged as right or wrong, it is better to weigh them based on their cause and effect. Loneliness is just a state of the mind. I wonder if being lonely and happy has anything to do with maturity.

Truths

1/23/2009 | 4 Comments

It was a good thing to be addicted to the internet in a way. There are very few disappointments. How sad can one get if someone doesn't reply to your scrap? Ha! But I have deleted my orkut account halfway on my journey between ignorance and truth. Time will tell if I've been right. I feel its really true that engineers are socially inept. What will you choose between the two: having a beautiful possession and losing it, or not having it at all? Pretty good day today. Do you like lending your books to others? Most probably you don't mind. But I like to. How do you feel if someone scribbles on it and gives it back? Maybe you don't mind. But I do. I go on days thinking about it, until someone else tears off a page and gives it back.

Sometimes I laugh about it. Who cares! Genuine skepticism rocks me when I think I don't have any mental discomfort. Another interesting question I've been trying not to think about is the pain of knowledge. Is it better to be killed by curiosity, or by unpleasant truths? Sadly enough, I got my answer before I could waste more time on it - If I'm to die anyway, why not die knowing more?

Ha ha ha ha ha hoooo...

Now playing...

jaane dO na... jaane, jaane dO na...
mujhe tO jaane dO na, chodO baahem meri, mujhe tO jaane dO na,
jaane dO na... jaane, jaane dO na...

Why on earth am I even blogging...
A beautiful e-card from Paulo Coelho's site:


I woke up. Thank goodness, it was just a dream. I was feeling very lightheaded. I got out of the bed, and placed my feet on the floor. The marble felt very cold. Neurons fired, and every part of my body came back to life. I knew they were all real. Not just dreams.